Ok. I know i have a sad sad life, but I have found a babysitter for Belle, and she is with B right now at the house. It is 8pm on a Tuesday, and although I called her so I could do a business dinner, I am taking advantage of the time alone and am up at a coffeehouse on the corner with my computer and just me.
And I feel guilty and nervous. I hope she can get her to go to bed. I hope that Belle doesnt scream and cry for mama. I hope she falls asleep. I also organized her for next week Monday when I will go out and play with a colleague from work.
Belle is tired today as is mama. cause we woke up at 0500 and while normally B will fall back asleep as I get up to start my morning, this morning she didnt so she is ultra tired. it also doesnt help that I couldnt sleep last night, so we were both awake often as i tossed and turned.
and yes I know. I need to move her to her own bed. but here we are in this apartment here in NC, and there is no "her own bed" to be had. She has her littel day bed in our room in NL. so hopefully she will get used to napping there with our new nanny Tammi. and then slowly i can get her to go to bed there as well.
Not that I want her out of my bed. cause i dont. but I am worried that she doesnt sleep as well because she is with me. and not getting good sleep isnt healthy. if it wasnt for that. we coudl co sleep til she decided it was enough. :O
i am exhausted, which means taking advantage of this time is actualy hard for me. cause i want to also be in bed at 8pm and instead will be heading back around 930 or so.
different things in the works now. have to start the packing process to get back. and this is sad and stressful all at once.
plus work is weird right now. lots going on, and my job is morphing into something but i dont know what. and there is a territorial pissing contest happening and i feel stuck in the middle.
ok off to do something else with this computer and my time.
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